(no subject)

 We went to Vermont a few days ago for a couple days-it was fun. We did a lot of touristy stuff and went on a walk at one of the state parks. It went better than previous vacations because our son seemed to have a better time. He was still grumpy a good bit of the time but there were some highlights.

I guess overall things have been better but I have been really down lately. I'm just not as sure of myself as I was just a few months ago. I'm not as motivated at school, I've lost touch with pretty much everyone in my life, I don't feel good about myself intellectually or socially, I just feel like I'm having a big identity crisis.

I feel like I'm just a big downer.

 

I have a cold, it snuck up on me a few days ago. It's weird, I'll be feeling okay and then all of a sudden I can't breathe. Or I was fine all through class and then I went to math tutoring and couldn't stop coughing, probably making my tutor wonder why I bothered coming in. I swear I was functional earlier. By the way, the tutoring didn't help. I had a quiz review I just wanted to go over and she insisted on re-teaching me the whole section in a more confusing way, and making me write down vocabulary words and definitions. I get it she is helping me learn these things long term, but I just want to pass the quiz.

We went to see how our son did on the standardized testing they do every other year at my son's school. We know he does really well academically, it's just interesting to see which areas he doesn't do as exceptionally. This year it was punctuation, lol. I looked at his results from 3rd grade and it was capitalization. I think that is a result of the technology age we are in. Even adults don't use proper grammar or punctuation and yet I think that is more important than say, how well you do math.

I think we are just at a loss as to what to do with him. He is so ahead academically, but still needs so much help with organization, routines, basic skills. I see so much of us in him. It's an interesting combination.

So my husband took an interest in our IQ's after we had a recent re-evaluation of our son. My husband found an IQ test online that may or may not be accurate. I know you should really go to a licensed tester and get the real deal but not everyone has thousands of dollars to spend on that. So we took this online test and found that we both are also above average IQ. I'm of the mind that it doesn't really change anything, at this point. Colleges don't look at IQ. Work doesn't look at IQ. I'm glad we found out early with our son so he can make his schools aware of his potential and they will hopefully challenge him. But what can adults do? My husband is of the mind that he should be using that potential, but I think that for every gifted person who uses that potential for leverage, there are many gifted people who never had any privilege, didn't go to private school or an elite college and still had a happy life. But I also understand wanting the best for our son and wanting him to use that potential to his advantage. And yet do we groom him to get into an elite high school and an elite college? Or follow his lead and let his interests and skills lead the way?

I think he has really grown this year. He used to stay away from sports; this year he did basketball and track and field. He joined Math Olympiads again, and did a couple other elective activities. I'm happy to see him so well rounded. I was concerned with the amount of time he likes to spend on the computer and other screens. I still am concerned at times and I wish he didn't have to use a screen for activities that "when I was a kid" you didn't need a screen for. But I don't want to be one of those parents who's stuck in the past. Technology is our present and future and it's a plus to be proficient in those skills, which he is. Overall I know I bitch about him a lot but I'm very proud and so excited to see what the future holds for him.