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Sep. 30th, 2012 02:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
becomingkateI'm thinking of quitting my job or at least trying to transfer to something else. Right now I'm a bus monitor on a small van that takes 3 kids to a school just out of state. I go twice a day-once to pick them up at their houses and bring them to school, and then after about a 3 hour break I go back to the school and we bring them home. It sounds easy right? Here's the problem-I've been having chronic stomach aches lately. Because of many medical issues I've had since birth this is very uncomfortable for me and I'm never sure if I'm going to be okay or if I'll need to run to a bathroom. This is not really cool when you're stuck on a van on the highway.
It's mostly anxiety, because usually as soon as I get home, or sometimes even after the kids have left the van, I start to feel better. But because it's so random, I'm never sure what's going to happen.
I'd love to stay home, but we make just a little less than enough money. My job is only part time-I really need a full time one. My husband is okay with me going back to school IF I study something I'm actually going to use. But how am I to know what will be lucrative?
I've mentioned before that I have a project in the works, and I've considered making a website for this project. I'd need to take some classes for that because I don't know the first thing about making websites.
I wish I could just function normally and get a real job but I don't think a lot of people are going to be accepting of my having to randomly find a bathroom all the time. LOL
My mom did mention that I could try for disability, which I guess I'll bring up with my doctor when I go in a couple weeks. I hate having to do that, because there are people with real disabilities and here I am just not being able to handle not being near a bathroom. I feel like that's a lame excuse. But I don't know what else to do. I also don't really want to go back to school. I'm not really very self motivated.
Blah...
It's mostly anxiety, because usually as soon as I get home, or sometimes even after the kids have left the van, I start to feel better. But because it's so random, I'm never sure what's going to happen.
I'd love to stay home, but we make just a little less than enough money. My job is only part time-I really need a full time one. My husband is okay with me going back to school IF I study something I'm actually going to use. But how am I to know what will be lucrative?
I've mentioned before that I have a project in the works, and I've considered making a website for this project. I'd need to take some classes for that because I don't know the first thing about making websites.
I wish I could just function normally and get a real job but I don't think a lot of people are going to be accepting of my having to randomly find a bathroom all the time. LOL
My mom did mention that I could try for disability, which I guess I'll bring up with my doctor when I go in a couple weeks. I hate having to do that, because there are people with real disabilities and here I am just not being able to handle not being near a bathroom. I feel like that's a lame excuse. But I don't know what else to do. I also don't really want to go back to school. I'm not really very self motivated.
Blah...
